Umm Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler…

We spent last night watching new movie 1 of 7, ‘Office Space’. For those of us that work in an office environment and live a good portion of our waking hours in cubicles it’s a highly amusing movie. Putting up with idiosyncrasies, voices that pierce into our brains, over bubbly people, oh yeah they exist everywhere in every workplace, people know at least ONE of those characters. I had no idea the main character was Berger in Sex in the City,Tom pointed it out to me. Freaky! I’d seen Office Space before and I’m a die-hard Sex in the City fan, but never put two and two together.

Favourite quote time:

Milton: “And I said, I don’t care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I’m, I’m quitting, I’m going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they’ve moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn’t bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it’s not okay because if they take my stapler then I’ll set the building on fire…”

While on the subject of the movie, I have a confession to make.I’m kind of Milton. Not a subversive mumbler/firebug or anything, but I have a jones for a particular stapler that I’ve had since 1988. Yeah see this stapler is metal, METAL PEOPLE!! There is no such thing as a run-of-the-mill office stapler that is made of metal these days, seems they are all plastic. My stapler also has a handy dandy staple remover on it’s back end. YES it’s built in!! No having to look for a staple remover. How cool is that??

Most people have learned to not try and separate me from my stapler (the hard way) because I would seriously freak out sad I know, but once when I came back from vacation I found it was missing. I went around from desk to desk peering trying to catch someone with it on their desks. As time went on I got more cranky and I threatened to use the stapler remover on anyone that took it as a joke and I even had some help looking for it (probably just to get me to shut the hell up) but nothing, nobody had it.

After mourning it’s apparent loss for a good part of the day I went to print something at a small printer that was between my desk and another and lo and behold there it was, tucked back almost out of sight, still with it’s little bee sticker on it. I pounced on it with pure joy and promptly LOCKED it in my desk. Yeah, that wasn’t going to happen again.

Turns out some out of town partners we had were working in the office while I was away and one had sat at my desk and had ‘borrowed’ my stapler neglecting to return it. The same dude came back a few weeks later and was working nearby. He walked over to my desk asking to borrow a stapler and I smiled sweetly and pointed at the one on the nearby desk. Well I think I smiled sweetly, ok maybe I bared my teeth.

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One Response to Umm Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler…

  1. Pingback: Sunday Funny « Americanuck

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